finding out the sex

[colo1278]

dilemma:

my DH does not want find out the sex of the baby someday and I do.

We both have good points... (he wants it to be a surprise and I think it is already a surprise at 20 weeks... and I want to decorate the nursery in gender-specific ways and not have a shower full of white, yellow and green)

My suggestion- we find out for the 1st kid, don't for the 2nd and 3rd. My reasoning behind this is that siblings usually do not get a shower, there is a 50% chance of being able to wear handmedowns and use same bedding and we're having three kids anyway, so he'll get his way twice.)

Any thoughts?

[theresak]

I would have burst from curiosity if I hadn't found out, all three times. Guess I'm just impatient. :lol:

[lara]

If you do decide to not find out the sex......have the ultrsound tech write it down and seal it in an envelope....that way there is always the option to find out before the birth. I have heard of women doing this when their husbands were adamant about not finding out....and the husbands were often the ones to break down and want to peak first!

I personally would burst if I didn't get to find out the sex at 20 weeks. I mean...I'm the one carrying the child and dang it it makes those last weeks so much easier knowing a little bit more about who's inside you and who you're going to get to meet!

[Dane]

We decided not to find out early with my first baby, wanting it to be a "surprise". By the time he arrived into the world, I had gone through an exhausting labor and c-section, and was just happy to be alive and have a healthy baby, that I couldn't enjoy the surprise part, haha.

With #2 and now #3, we found out ahead of time. IMO, this was soooooo much better! We brought the older son to both ultrasounds, and we made a big event out of "what will it be??" on the day of the appt. So, the whole immediate family got to find out together, and afterwards we had a little celebration.

I like knowing the sex and name ahead of time, plus it makes planning alot easier.

[Aaron_F]

I have never understood the idea of waiting to find out the sex as a surprise

Its a surprise whether you find out now or later

:D

I found out the sex of both of mine early on

[colo1278]

thanks for all the responses. My DH says he asked around at work and a lot of people who did find out the sex before said if they had to do it again, they wouldn't find out.


I like the envelope idea- we have discussed that before.

[H&G'sMom]

I could image not knowing, LOL. I loved knowing that by babies were boys. I think it helped by bond with them so much more even before they were born. We never gave it a second thought... :lol3:

[NCfitnessgirl]

Are you pg and I missed it??? :unsure:

[colo1278]

not yet my dear...

[NCfitnessgirl]

not yet my dear...


It will happen.

[colo1278]

I know! :) I have a good feeling that I will be able to share great news soon!

[jackie]

With our first, it was a suprise and I don't regret that, with our 2, 3rd & 4th we found out just so it would be easier with hand me downs and bedroom set ups. No regrets.

[homeschoolmom]

I could image not knowing, LOL. I loved knowing that by babies were boys. I think it helped by bond with them so much more even before they were born. We never gave it a second thought... :lol3:

I completely agree with this. We even named our babies before they were born. Not only did it help DH and I bond with our children before they were born, it even helped our younger ones bond I think. In fact, I wanted a last minute name change with my last before he was born and my other 3 kids pitched a fit because they were so used to calling him Baby Jake. Needless to say, Jake he remained!:lol:

[kszal]

I wouldn't want to tell people if I found out (which I think we would, but later). I hate hate hate dressing kids in all pink or blue.

[sArAh]

I wouldn't want to tell people if I found out (which I think we would, but later). I hate hate hate dressing kids in all pink or blue.
that's what my boss did. He didn't tell any family or friends until the day of the baby shower. That way they didn't get all cheesy blue stuff. Instead they got everything in yellow and green.

[fitnesschick]

i didn't want to know in advance. i love my memories of looking at my own baby and finding out if they were a boy or girl before anyone else :) of course, i'm sure the midwife saw first but she never said anything.

i wouldn't do it, but that's me. i liked waiting and dreaming about it :)

[liberty]

I loved the mystery of not knowing for all three of my pregnancies. The excitement of finding out was the only thing that kept me going when I was huge and close to the end. It is a pretty big deal when they pull the babe out and yell out "it's a ....." I can't imagine it is like that at the ultrasound but who knows?? We didn't do the whole nursery decorating until after the babe was here and no showers until there was a live baby in my arms, this is all due to my mom's ukrainian superstitions.
C

[Inatic]

I'd always want to find out while i was pregnant.

We didnt know/find out the sex of all 5 of ours while i was carrying them (no twins). Not for a lack of trying. Some were just to bouncy in there.

End result of having had 5 boys, you can imagine we really wanted to know.

[Aaron_F]

With our first, it was a suprise and I don't regret that, with our 2, 3rd & 4th we found out just so it would be easier with hand me downs and bedroom set ups. No regrets.

So your saying that it was a surprise when you found out at birth, but there was no surprise when you found out earlier?

[theresak]

So your saying that it was a surprise when you found out at birth, but there was no surprise when you found out earlier?
Not to speak for her, but I see what they're saying. When we had our first, we knew his sex, his approximate weight and exactly when he would be born since it would be scheduled. It removed a bit of the positive drama of the calls that I was in labor, etc. I admit I missed it a bit, but I still would have burst not knowing all that time.

And for Liberty, in my experience the ultrasound tech would just casually say "and it's a boy" like here's the toes.

[Aaron_F]

In my case I didnt have a choice as it was plainly obvious what they were.

[taniea19]

I found out with DD #1, Dd#2 A complete suprise I thought she was a boy for sure. DD# 3 found out.

My suggestion would be find out, You can have gender spacfic stuff.
If you dont want to find out do it on your first.
T

[mardgra426]

I did not find out the sex either. We liked the surprise factor as well. And we did not have a lot of neutral colored clothes at the shower. We had a few white onesies and undershirts. Almost everyone brought us clothes to the hospital after finding out we had a girl. We did do the nursery in a neutral theme-- just because we are not into all things pink or blue.......we chose an animal theme with blues, oranges, greens etc. Our daughter loves it!!
We did not have trouble planning at all. We bought basic things that were not all pink (or blue), just in case we have more than one child ( of another sex) so we won't have to buy it again. We are not paid like that!! :funny:
If we do have anohter baby someday we won't find out the sex again.
It's a personal opinion. My hubby wanted to know, but after a little convincing :naughty: he is so happy now that we did not ind out.

[Tina]

I didn't want to find out with my first.

With this one though, I think part of me wants to know just because if it's a boy , I will need more clothes and things that are blue. (I have a girl already). AND we have lots of family members who love to shop for babies, so if I told them it was going to be a boy I know we would get lots of boy things.

But I'm still not totally sure if I want to find out.:o

[jackie]

So your saying that it was a surprise when you found out at birth, but there was no surprise when you found out earlier?

Sorry if that was confusing, but with our first we didn't know the sex and with the others we found out.