Discussion in 'Fitness & Pregnancy' started by dare, Dec 4, 2006.

  1. dare

    dare I'm not fat...I'm pregnant!

    K, so I have to vent a little this morning b/c I am feeling very crappy & self conscious of my new preggo body.

    I will be 4mos. pregnant this wednesday, and am already showing a little - those who know I'm pregnant have commented they can now see a little belly.
    I am both happy & a little uneasy about my new body & belly. Somedays I am so happy I can't wait to show it off, the next minute I feel embarrassed that I am showing already & try to hide it as much as I can.

    I have had some comments from friends that they can't believe I am showing already because most of them say that they didn't show until 5 or 6 months. It seems that's all I have been hearing lately & it's starting to make me feel bad, like something's wrong with me b/c I am showing so soon. ( This is my first baby).

    It's not like I am pigging out or eating all crappy foods, and I am still trying hard to exercise & eat right. Even my doctor commented last time I was in that I had gained a bit of weight! It's really starting to depress me, as I've always been self conscious about my body, and it's even harder now for me to feel good about my pregnant self when all I hear is, "oh I can't believe your showing already! I was still so skinny at 4 months!!".

    Geez, it's not like I'm a big fat cow or anything, or sit on the couch eating dougnuts all day & never exercise!!!! It's making me very very sad. :( :(
  2. Blondell

    Blondell Former Postwhore

    People don't mean it as a negative thing IMO. I heard that ALOT when I was preggers w/ my son. They just want to be a part of something great that is going on w/ your body. You are bringing a new life into the world! Your body is going to change. It's part of the process. After the baby is born you'll bounce back nicely, if you keep w/ the exercise and eating right. It's normal to feel all over the place emotionally. :console: You are going to do fine and your body will do what it is supposed to do.

    Have you had an ultrasound yet? Do you know (or even want to know) whether you are going to have a little girl or a little boy? :love:
  3. freckles

    freckles Senior Member

    Ahh, the emotional rollercoaster that is pregnancy. Don't feel too bad about showing already... I was only 3 months pregnant with my first and people were guessing that I was pregnant. I was still wearing most of my pre-prego clothes! I certainly didn't think I looked pregnant, but people kept telling me to stop trying to hide it... which sucks, because I was trying to hide it from my coworkers (they wouldn't let me do most of my job when I was prego).

    Once you are pregnant people seem to think they have a right to tell you how to live... you are going to need a thick skin for the duration of the pregnancy. Not only will people tell you what to eat and when to eat it, strangers will comment on your size, and strangers will want to touch your belly without asking. For some reason being pregnant seems to make you public property.

    Try and relax and just go with the flow... this is the one time when you can just sit back and let your body do the work :)

    Best wishes!
  4. KatieB

    KatieB Fake It Until You Make It

    Great advice already.

    Try to let it go - the self consciousness, the negative feelings... pregnancy is really such a short time, and you should be able to enjoy it.

    And as far as people thinking they can just touch your belly and crap like that, I absolutely did not tolerate that when I was pregnant with dd and next time I won't either. I don't let strangers or even just friends and family touch me whenever they want now, why would I just because I am pregnant?

    Thick skin, and don't be afraid to tell people if they are bothering you. If they get upset, blame it on the hormones :D.
  5. colo1278

    colo1278 I'm growing a person!

    don't fret my dear- I am in the same boat- first baby, 17 weeks, and too big to fit in my normal clothes... I even had a guy a work say "jeez, my wife is on baby #2 and she's not showing at all". Then he had the gall to say "well, she was thinner than you when she GOT pregnant"...

    and my hubby kept reminding me that a girlfriend was still in her size 4s at 4 months... yeah, well I know she was using a belly band, so that doesn't COUNT!!!

    Oh and I had to go to Hawaii last week looking like this, and I felt like most other tourists were looking at me like "jeez, fatty, did you forget to work out before you went on vacay?"

    I know it's hard, just try to focus on the beautiful little life growing inside of you and ignore everyone who makes a comment, whether or not they meant it meanly or not. :)
  6. trinitylove

    trinitylove Buff in spirit

    Cheer up.....every pregnant woman has to deal with the expected and unexpected changes their bodies will go through.....it's ok. :console:
    As far as the weight gain-if you're taking care of yourself and eating well on the most part, don't worry.
    Some people barely eat anything and gain 30 lbs.
    Some people pig out on donuts and french fries and gain 10 lbs.
    You just can't predict 100 % how you're body will respond to pregnancy.
    Just take care of yourself and baby and who cares what anyone thinks!!
  7. fitnesschick

    fitnesschick Member

    i'm sorry. it's difficult when your body is changing and somehow it doesn't meet people's odd expectations. by the time of my 4th pregnancy i needed pregnancy clothes at TEN WEEKS :lol3:

    try and relax and enjoy the fact that your body - YOU -are creating a miracle inside.
  8. andi

    andi anyone selling sleep?

    Ok, I can make you feel better. I am only 8 weeks along and I am showing! 8 weeks!:shock: and people "make fun" of me all of the time too. I look like I am way further along. And this is my 1st. i cannot wear any of my normal clothes, it really sucks. and then funny thing is I really haven't gained that much weight....
  9. dare

    dare I'm not fat...I'm pregnant!

    Thanks for your responses everyone! I feel a lot better since reading them :wave:
  10. liberty

    liberty Active Member

    You may have to grow a thicker skin with your pregnancy. People make the weirdest comments and it does not stop after the babe is born. I listened closely to the people who told me I glowed and only ever listened to my doctor when the mention of weight came up. Wait until people start giving you parenting advice when you have a newborn, very irritating to the nursing hormones
  11. fitnesschick

    fitnesschick Member

    thick skin - yep, definitely a great idea. people gave up on me after about the first 2 years of trying to tell me i was doing everything wrong :lol3:
  12. KatieB

    KatieB Fake It Until You Make It

    People really need a smack sometimes.

    Just this past Thanksgiving, I had to literally YELL at my father in law because he wanted to give my 2 year old daughter SODA. He was like "it's fine" and I was like "no it is certainly not fine and I forbid you to give my toddler soda" - he argued with me for like 2 full actual minutes before giving in.

    2 years ago I wouldn't have been able to do that - you definitely pick up more and more mommy skills over time and the earlier you start sticking up for yourself when people try to overpower you, the better off you will be.

    I would never mention a pregnant woman's size, unless I was saying "OMG, look at you, you're so tiny!" (Which I would say to just about any pregnant woman unless it was an obvious lie in which case, some other compliment about her general gorgeousness.)
  13. GraceGirl

    GraceGirl His Beautiful Paradox

    People are idiots and disrespectful. If you're four months and just now showing, you're doing awesome! I was definitely showing by four months with my son, and I swear I started showing by six weeks this time around (though maybe everyone else couldn't tell). I'm now almost 12 weeks, and I've definitely popped. It was actually a relief when my doc said last week I was measuring three weeks bigger because I KNEW my stomach seemed awfully large!

    So don't worry about people. As said, you'll hear alot of rude an unsolicited advice during the rest of your pregnancy and motherhood. Just wait until you're 8 months and every grandma in the grocery store thinks you need a piece of her mind!

    You're fine and beautiful, pregnant momma!!
  14. theresak

    theresak Guest

    How is that even an arguement??? :shrug: It's your kid, why do the grandparents feel like they can override your choices - particularly the healthy ones?

    When my oldest was a baby, I had to yell repeatedly at my MIL to stop covering his vegetables with salt and butter, and drowning his food with gravy. She just couldn't get that I didn't want him to get used to eating his food with all that crap on it.

    My mom used to give the boys pop absentmindedly, since she would always have a glass in her hand and grandkids crawl all over her house. My kids are the only ones that don't get pop in baby bottles, but she didn't always look at what kid was on her lap before giving them a drink. :finger:

    So annoying.
  15. homeschoolmom

    homeschoolmom Well-Known Member

    All I can say is get used to it.:( Unfortunately, when you're pregnant you become public domain. People will want to touch your belly, give you advice you never asked for and generally want to be in your business. But... if you think about it, it's really not such a terrible thing. Everyone wants to be part of a miracle. Babies are little miracles and everyone just wants to have a small part of it. So comparing pregnancy bellies is just a way of participating in your pregnancy, your miracle. Not such a bad thing...
  16. theresak

    theresak Guest

    No, not such a bad thing - but it can get annoying!
  17. KatieB

    KatieB Fake It Until You Make It

    Ew, the people who used to live in the apartment downstairs from us used to give their 2-year old soda in a bottle all the time. It pissed me off so bad.

    If your kid can't even drink out of a cup, then they DEFINITELY don't need soda. Not that one who can drink out of a cup needs it, but c'mon!!!

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